It really bothers me how bipolar my family can be. Today seemed to be going very good, there were those moments that were just annoying. But it turns into negativity so fast. It seems like they have some dilusional pleasure in fighting and making people hurt badly inside. I try to make things better and put some sense in there mind but it seems to soak out their ears.



I hate how you act like you are fucking god ruler of life and humanity. The truth is you are so low to the ground people could walk over you and not notice anything. When you are in the mode I truly can careless about you, I hate you, and will try to make your life misirable in the most truthful and humaine way. I will tell you shit you probably would never want to hear out of your own child and literally not give fuck. "Your precious first child" is growing up and growing smarter each day. I've found ways to protect my younger siblings so they won't have to go through the shit and torture you put us through. I will literally go rabies style on you both if you ever hurt them for non-excusible reasons. If you ever strike or fight with me I'm going to pack my bags and leave. I know people that will let me stay with them if i need to and there are so many places where people will respect me, let me be me, will never hurt me the ways you have.



I can't and I won't take your shit any more. But I have become so numb and dead that I just do what you want me to do or say what you want me to say because I can't take being put down or hurt anymore.